Sunday, March 27, 2011

It's like you're trying to sabotage my fame.

Don't you think it kind of sucks when you know you're about to get something and you end up getting disappointed? Because you think you're almost there then BAM! Wake up bitch. Dream's over.

Kinda happens to me a lot. LIKE A LOT!

It's like the world is trying to sabotage me. Trying to sabotage my dreams.

There's more to me than meets the eye, you know?

Guess what? I'll tell you something. I know you think I look familiar but you just can't remember where you've seen me. Right? I know that's how you guys feel when you see me.

So let me refresh your memory.

You may have seen me in the news. I have managed to get small parts in a few movies that you know.

I'm *almost* kind of a big deal.

But for some reason, I always get fired. That's why I'm always in the news.


I was supposed to be in Twilight.


But the scene where I was supposed to be in got deleted because according to the producers, my appearance wasn't really that relevant. NOT RELEVANT? I gave my best vampire impression there!!! Without the fangs. But still. I was fierce!

I was also supposed to be in Inception.


They fired me because I posed when I was supposed to pretend I was sleeping??? It kind of pissed them off.

You may have seen me in A Walk To Remember.


I didn't get fired. But I didn't get a long-enough camera exposure. They took the camera off me when I covered my nose. But I had to! Someone there farted so can you blame me? If you didn't see me there, then you weren't paying close attention.

I was also in Terminator 2. Where I met Edward Furlong. My first love.


But I was fired because according to them, I was supposed to act worried, scared, and panicky! Not smiling like a love drunk. I'm sure the girls understand. But it annoyed the producers. And my co-actors.

But the biggest movie I have ever landed a role in?

Titanic.

Yes. TITANIC!

Look!


Here's another one.


But I got deleted in these scenes. They gave me all these nonsense BS like, "You weren't supposed to be wearing a swimsuit!" And, " You aren't supposed to look happy! You are cold and drowning!" But can you blame me? I didn't want to be just another nervous drowning person. I wanted to be the "cool" drowning person. Also, what the hell did they know, right? What if one of the passengers was really wearing a swimsuit JUST IN CASE?

It pissed them the fuck off because, well, IT WASN'T IN THE SCRIPT.

Dammit. I think the world is trying to tell me something. Or maybe, just maybe, someone somewhere is trying to sabotage my attempts in becoming successful.

Well no, I'm still not gonna do what other stars do. Like spread naked pictures of themselves and SURPRISE! A movie project. *cough*Vanessa Hudgens*cough* (Not judging. Just saying.)

What? I didn't say anything.

26 comments:

  1. You seriously are the limit Gnetchy Gnetch and you always always always make me laugh like a mad woman.

    PS Vanessa Hudgens is someone I cannot ever tolerate. I cried when Zac and Vanessa separated. I was that happy.

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  2. Iiiiii knew it!Hollywood dudes' loss though!You're a star and they're afraid of ya!
    :D

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  3. thanks for making me cry out loud today...cry out loud because of severe laughing. LOL. How could you thought of that? those pictures of yours are really great. You must get serious at it. are they for sale? hahaha.

    I love the"inception" picture.

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  4. hahaha! u made me cough so hard cos i choked on my laughter!! :p
    you're sumthing else girl!,lool

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  5. I was laughing while I was reading every line! This is freakin' hilarious!!! Nice edits :) Love it!

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  6. See? I always KNEW you were a star!!!!

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  7. I KNEW you looked familiar!!! Your portrayal as wedding guest in Walk to Remember was just...just...award winning. Oscar worthy, really.

    PS
    Ummm, have you seen Edward Furlong lately? I used to totally be all up on his hog after Terminator and American History X. Saw him in an episode of CSI and also as a meth lab operator in Green Hornet...not hot. He chubbed out...big time.

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  8. you had the chance in a life time but you let it away... ehehhehe... nice blog and sense of humor... nice... you made my day...

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  9. You fucken rock G!!!! love your blog!!!! :)

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  10. This has to go down as one of the funniest things that I have evr witnessed in my life!

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  11. I think what hurt your career more than anything was agreeing to be in the Twilight movies. That's like appearing in concert with Justin Bieber. Not as bad as Rebecca Black, but still, not good either. ;-)

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  12. Wow. I feel like, based of those pictures, you really added to those movies. I guess Inception didn't really want to win best picture anyway, did they?

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  13. I agree with the person above. Guess these film didn't want perfection ;)

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  14. Haha the Inception picture is the best! You are too funny.

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  15. Probably a good thing they cut you from Twilight those movies are crap anyway and would just have a negative effect on your career.

    You should try to get a role in the new Robocop movie when it comes out that'll make you huge.

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  16. Thanks for the brain storms. It has been fun to let it all hang out. This was a no-holds-barred mental jamboree that will be missed.
    Wedding Dresses
    Very nice , I shall try.. Well deserved! I really enjoy your blog and am impressed by your finds. Keep it up!
    Sweet memories.

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  17. @Ratzy: Hahaha. I'm so glad. Well, about Zac and Vanessa, I really didn't pay much attention to them. :)

    @Ria: I know, right?? Haha.

    @Sey: Well I can sell these. I mean, I'm so broke!!! And would you agree that my posing in that Inception scene was totally appropriate? Right?

    @Kitkat: Aw, thanks girl.

    @Arianne: Thanks so much!!

    @Middle Child: Right? How could these producers let go of me just like that?

    @Los Schoenys: I know! It was the best role ever. And about Edward Furlong, yes, the last time I saw him was in CSI. I didn't see Green Hornet though. I think I'm partly to be blamed for his appearance. He stopped caring about himself after our split. (Whattt?) :p

    @Musingan: Was it my fault? I was just trying to make my "roles" better. Haha.

    @Carol: Aww, girl! Thank you!

    @Nabo: Hehe. You think so?

    @Jay: I was kinda hesitant to take that part because I didn't want to be seen with Rob Pattinson and/or Kristen Stewart. But I was broke so... And please! Don't mention Rebecca Black. I beg you!!! :p

    @Logic: Hahaha. I guess so. I mean, they wouldn't have removed me if they did. :p

    @Carina: Hahaha!!!

    @Lilly: Thank you!!

    @Wolfy: I know, right? That movie would have "Lohaned" me.

    @Vickyff: Uhm. Okay, what?

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  18. I really loved your performance as Drowning Girl #4. I thought you added some real depth to the character.

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  19. I would just liek to say that Vanessa Hudgens makes me want to hurt tadpoles. And what have tadpoles EVER done to the world? lesigh.. I watched Titanic again and this time I totally saw you in it but then I got mad because Kate wouldn't move her ass over and Leo died :( BOO. We should come up with our own reality TV show.. liek BloggerShore or uh. The Bloggerette.. Hrm. I need more sleep and then perhaps I'll come up with wittier names than the shit I'm spewing out now.

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  20. LOL! Gnetch you are insane. I can't wait to see you in Hollywood real soon hahaha!

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  21. It's almost like someone offering you
    cake ,and giving you a turd instead .
    Good job on the photoshop Gnetchy !
    ;-)

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  22. I literally laughed out loud when I got to Inception :D

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  23. Haha.. you're truly entertaining. Now I remember seeing you in some of these movies. Wait, didn't you also appear in Basic Instinct and Shrek? :P Looking forward to see more of you, hopefully a main role, yay!

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  24. Great post! I think I saw you in that Wizard movie. What's the name of the movie again?

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  25. @Nicki: You did? I'm glad you spotted me while I was drowning. I gave my best!! :p

    @Ty: Yeah. I almost drowned Kate when we were filming. I told the director that the movie would be better if Leo ends up with one of the drowning people. *ahem*

    @Jan: Hahaha. Thanks!!!

    @PC: Thanks!!! I should get used to calling you PC right now.

    @Em: Hehe. Thank you!

    @Nino: Thanks! But Shrek? I was never on Shrek! Damn, dude!!!

    @Iz: See? I've been in so many movies, I forgot what wizard movie I was in.

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  26. i think i saw you in pirates of the caribbean 4 as well. you were riding a merrmaid.

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