Friday, April 23, 2010

Another Great Idea To Make Life Easier For Lazy People

I didn't go to work today. I woke up 2 hours late and I was really lazy.

But hey, I had a busy day at work yesterday. I was tired. And sleep deprived.

Which brought me to an idea of another leave.

You remember the day when I had pimples and I didn't want to go to work so I thought there should be a Pimple Leave? Because Sick Leave didn't seem appropriate for pimples? Like, would you call in sick because you have pimples? No. Right? So there should be a Pimple Leave.

That got me nowhere.

But I have another GREAT idea!

A Lazy Leave. Sounds good?

I know. There are times when we feel heavy, disoriented, sleepy, uninterested in everything -- hey, we're just normal people. Let's face it. When we force ourselves to go to work even if we don't feel like it, we are not as productive as compared to when we are MOTIVATED to go to work.

When I feel like going to work, I'm very productive. And I can think straight.

Unlike when I'm lazy. I'm telling you. When I'm lazy, I do these at work:

♦Space out.

♦Read blogs.

♦Comment on blogs.

♦Join 20sb discussions (except when the questions require long answers).

♦Browse the Internet.

♦Stalk people on Twitter.

♦Stalk people on Facebook (and I have 2 Facebook accounts).


♦Stand up, go to the ladies' room, powder my nose (or pee. Whatever).

♦Make myself a cup of coffee even if I don't feel like drinking coffee.
♦Talk to a coworker.

♦Space out again.

♦Hate mutant boss. Oh, that's not part of my laziness. Sorry about that. It just came out.

So, you see? I'm just doing the company a favor. I love my job so much that I don't want my employers to waste money on unproductive people. And I don't want to waste the company's electricity because of me being there, doing nothing important.


So Lazy Leave should be legalized.

I'm just making life easier for everyone.

But that's just PMS talking.

Note: If you're a coworker but not a friend and for some reason you found out that I blog and you're reading this now, this is just some sort of sick humor. So don't you dare use this against me. DON'T. EVEN. TRY. Bitch.


  1. I think that note at the end was probably the best part. But yes, I fully believe in lazy leave as well. I don't do anything when I'm lazy. Might as well be at home watching reruns of The O.C. and One Tree Hill if I'm going to be doing nothing, right?

  2. AHAHAHA!! i love the part bout the mutant boss. You are just so funny. I'm beating myself up for being so late finding out your blog.

  3. LMAO @ 'non friend co worker' note at bottom...

    I SO TOTALLY AGREE! My friend blogs about her internship and so one day one of her 'hating ass enemy workers' seen her blog and told her boss where she was the day she called off... It was so funny. I couldn't believe that people will go that far just to ruin your life. My saying is... FUCK OFF! hehe..

    Following you now!

  4. Hahaha! You should draw up a Lazy Leave Bill! I'm sure you'll have lots of supporters! ;p

    In my last job I was like that. LOL. Spent my time surfing the net and talk on the phone. It was fun. Especially when you're getting paid for it. ;p

  5. I think this is a great idea! I almost called in on Monday simply because I didn't feel like getting dressed and going into work. I think I'll pitch this idea to my boss in our next meeting.

  6. Hahaha! I'm pretty sure whoever that bitch co-worker of yours will never use this post against you, what with those all-caps don't-even-try threat?

  7. Sara: Definitely. We don't want to waste office electricity, right?

    Zac: That woman really is a mutant. I swear. And you're awesome!

    Randomista: Thanks for following. And yes. It happens a lot. Some people are just losers.

    Johana: I'm definitely gonna do that.

    Chicken: Tell me what your boss thinks. This is so gonna be an awesome kind of leave.

  8. Thanks for the nice giggle again :)

    Have a great weekend lady. And be lazy!

  9. Happy Lazy day Gnetch! Hahaha! This made me laugh and giggle too. We do the same thing when i am lazy but mostly on the internet thing lol! Be lazy as i'm no miss said hahaha!

    I'll vote for Senator Gnetch's Lazy Leave Bill...hahaha!

  10. That's fucking right!

    DON"Y even try! Because there is a crazy fucking bitch in Kansas that will find you and rip your goddamn head off!

    I'm ALL for you having a lazy day biotch!!!!

    I have 2 FB accounts too!! Oh wait we already knew that about each other didn't we???

    That's why we fucking rock this shit and we should ruuuun the country.

    Not just ANYONE can handle TWO FB accounts!


    And yes that was meant to be in all caps because I was YELLING at you!


  11. Lazy leave sounds bloody fantastic. I woke up this morning convinced it was Saturday - but no! I had to run to station and rush to work...completely unfair. You've got my vote!

  12. Janjan: No one would ever dare. Haha!

    I'm no miss: You're welcome. And yes, I'm gonna have a great lazy weekend.

    Mishieru: I should totally run for senator, right? I'd totally do that when I start looking my age. Thanks. Haha.

    Ashley: I really thought you were serious when you said you were offended! Dang! It was written in blood!! But okay, I'll put it back. You can't kill me (yet) anyway. How about the plans we made to rule the world? And I got Zac to join our cult, you know?

    TbR: Thanks. I'm actually thinking about another kind of leave. The I-Thought-It-Was-Saturday Leave. Yeah. I think it would be reasonable. Thanks! :)

  13. I took basically the entire week off. It was awesome.

  14. I'd TOTALLY write it in ketchup dude!

    I am such a pussy about blood.

    Mine, my kids... Blood fucks me up.

    Zac who?

    Is he going to be our bitch or do we have to share our reign with him?

  15. I would take pimple leave over lazy leave anyday! lol... I can be lazy at work/school, but I would avoid for all cost someone seeing me looking ugly. There is something sesriously wrong with that really....

  16. You do the exact. same. shit. I do when lazy at work.

    I think they have a lazy day. I call it a "mental health" day. For example:

    "Boss, I need a mental health day."

    "Faux Trixie, I totally understand. Please take off Friday."

    Done and DONE.

  17. I found you blog today and ta-da..i read the first line and can totally relate myself...i didnt go to work today, woke up 2hrs late, but had a busy week behind and feeling lazy I am finding new frnds on 20SB, blogging and tweeting.

    What a coincidence :-)

    I am a follower now look forward to new posts.

    Check me out at

  18. Richard: I wish I could do that too.

    Ashley: Zac is the 2nd commenter on this post. He's just as badass so we need to share our reign with him. Meaning, we still have to find someone willing to be our bitch.

    Carina: Pimple leave was a great idea. But it was ignored by the employers around the world.

    Faux Trixie: Ooh, mental health day. That's a good idea.

    Megha: Thanks, Megha. You had me at "ta-da..." :)

  19. This is, by far, your most brilliant post ever. I worship you, dear Gnetch. WORSHIP!

    Oh, I think I see the God-hates-me-lightning-storm coming. I should run.

  20. I'm on a lazy leave ,wanna borrow my time :D!
    Oh,btw yes it should legalised *nods head*,yes siree!

  21. I would vote for lazy leave! :/
    It's doing companies a favor! :/
    Tired, lazy people are so unproductive. :-) After a leave we'll produce so much more. :/ So when does the campaign start? :-)

    Hope you enjoyed the emoticons. LOL

  22. I need lazy leave too!! didn't want to come to work this morning.. but here i am!! [thank god i'm doing this ;-)]

    Nice blog!! :D

    N love the post it at the end!!

  23. Pimple day and lazy day. Perfect reasons to stay home.

    Can I also add bad hair day?

  24. I'd like that last note embroidered on a pillow for my bed please.