I am a self-confessed Twitter addict. I love it. If it's a dude, I would marry it. But I know a lot of people find Twitter annoying and I *so* understand why. Hell, I can even list the possible reasons why it is annoying. Because I'm very generous. And understanding too!
So.
1. People Similar To You - Not only is this uninteresting, it can sometimes be, well, offensive-slash-insulting. I know you know how I feel.
2. The Fail Whale - I don't see a lot of it lately but it is annoying. And the innocent whale gets all the blame. It's Twitter's fault! The whale is just a scapegoat. Or a scapewhale. You know. Fail Whale-Scapewhale?
God, I'm so funny.
3. The motherfucking spammers - This is the most irritating, I think. When you tweet something like, "burger" you'll get followed and/or mentioned by a burger site. No. Really. When you tweet "porn", you'll get followed by a porn site. What's even more annoying is that I keep tweeting about Johnny Depp and he hasn't stalked me or even mentioned me. I'm hurt, you know. I. AM. HURT.
Update: An example of my Johnny Depp-related tweet. Very innocent.
 |
4. The #FollowBack hashtag - I see this a lot. Trust me. This doesn't work. I mean, it does, but those who will follow you are RANDOM strangers who don't even care about your tweets. They just want to be followed back (which is the whole purpose of it, I know) because if you don't, they will unfollow the next day. No. Trust me. Try it.
I tweeted those (just for fun, I swear) and I got maybe about 20 new followers! They didn't even read the tweets. Well, they unfollowed the next day so...
5. Some people - Some. Not everyone. And I'm not really gonna say what people should and should not tweet. I'm not like that. SAY WHAT YOU WANT. It's what Twitter is all about. Plus, passive-aggressive tweets are only annoying when you think it's about you. Right? But those people, especially celebrities, who retweet the compliments they get, THAT. That's when I lose it. That's why I stopped following celebrities! The fuck is that for? Not that I'm judg-- well okay. I'm judging. Because you know, when you flood my timeline with retweets like these:
 |
| Don't bother finding this Twitter account because this doesn't exist. |
Okay. Maybe it's just me. But still.
I just can't...
 |
I sort of revised this post.
People tell me how awesome I am all the time.* But, I don't go around retweeting it and shit like that. That's just being ostentatious.
ReplyDelete*By "all the time" I mean "never."
Oh BTW, this is Jay. You know, your twitter stalker. ;-)
ReplyDeleteThanks for the great laugh!! :D
ReplyDeleteI didn't even realize that those hashtags were helping spammers! damn. . .lol
ReplyDeleteHa ha. I know I can come here and no matter what a f***ing it had been, I will always leave laughing. You make living so much easy GG. U rock. And, of course, Twitter does too.
ReplyDeletesimilar to me is a political activist with his leader's pic on display. fucking similar.
ReplyDeletehahaha! i don't follow celebrities too coz they flood my timeline with nonsense tweets. oh wait - i follow kaye brosas. she's an exception because she's funny and she doesn't tweet like a drunk person puking. Plus her tweets are hilarious!
ReplyDeleteRT @#followback #random #goatnuts Justin Bieber. @Tony the Tiger
ReplyDelete#blogcomment
ReplyDeletethat last woman is you, yeah? God G you are soooo emotional!! ;)
ReplyDeleteGnetchy Twatter Queen!
ReplyDeleteWhat's next after Clogger, Fuckbook and Fumbler? Wanna joing Fartpress or Clerk? Oh, btw, I just liked you on your Fuckbook page, I just noticed that you had one. How did I miss that? Ah, nevermind, keep on rockin'! :P
Jay: I know it's you!!! Ha!
ReplyDeleteWho's the stalker now, huh?
Yani: Thank you!
Carrymel: Hahaha! It does!
Ratzy: Aw, thank you! Means a lot!
Sami: Good for you! Haha!
Jan: Right? I have unfollowed celebs a long time ago.
Heckle: Dammit dude! :P
Steve: This. This is the most meaningful comment I've ever received. EVER!! :P
Carina: Yeah. I am very hormonal. I mean, emotional! Haha!
Nino: Dude. The Facebook fan page has been there for months and you ignored it!!! Kidding. Thanks for liking it. This blog now has 15 fans! Hahaha!
you know what?
ReplyDeleteI have a lovehate thing for twitter. I hate how much a lot of things about it annoys me but at the same time I'm still having and using my account. I know right?
recently there's a couple of people on twitter who followed me out of random (no, i don't use #followback) & kept tweeting me, asking me to desperately follow them back! WTHECK?
I started Tweeting but didn't have the stomach for it. Maybe it's a generational thing. But I think it was the fake followers that got to me. And I abhor SPAMMERS!
ReplyDeleteHope you're enjoying your summer.
You might get a kick out of our new dating videos. On our new VIDEO page. Getting Played part 1 and 2
Take care!
I agree that's why i left twitter. But sometimes it could be entertaining because of some stupid twitters right? :)
ReplyDeletelol, great post, cracked me up :))
ReplyDeleteI like me some Twitter too but I have 2 big pet peeves and you mentioned one, which is the retweeter. It's annoying when celebs do it and REALLY annoying when normal freakin' people do it. WE GET IT. You don't come across compliments often, yeesh.
ReplyDelete#2 would be follow Friday. OHMYGOODNESS. There is a person I follow that I can't stop following (politics or something) who @'s EVERYONE SHE KNOWS ON EVERY STINKIN' FRIDAY. Dear sweet Jesus. I get heartburn just thinking about it.
I found you on Twitter. I follow you now. Hooray totally acceptable Internet stalking!
Lor
@erisha - That's what I hate too. People who force others to get a follow back. E-punch?
ReplyDelete@The Guys - But I love Twitter. Some people are just really annoying. (That includes me, of course. Haha.)
@Mitch - No. It's the stupid users that are annoying. Other than that, it is VERY entertaining. And I thought you never had Twitter?
Also? You're back!!!
@Fashioneggplant - Thank you!!!
@Lor - TOTALLY!!! You said it perfectly! Hahaha!!! Yes, I forgot to mention the #FF's. I hate it when people retweet it when they get recommended. What the fuck?
Hahaha well me having a twitter, it's ancient history. I was there for like a month or two and that was years ago. Yeah, i am back but not totally i think. I just want a blog in handy when i want something in my head be written. And honestly, having a Gossip Girl Seasons 1-4 marathon made me want to have a blog again =)
ReplyDelete