Tuesday, October 11, 2011

This post was supposed to go nowhere. And then it went nowhere! Win.

I swear I've been trying to write a blog post since last week and I can't come up with anything! ANYTHING!!!!!! I mean, until now.

Writer's block.

Happens. A. Lot.

And it's annoying because there are times that you *know* you need to write something and you think you have this BRILLIANT idea but when you're in front of the computer, you just don't know how to start so you'll think and think and think and think but then your brain will just be so fucking mean and delete the idea that you've thought of just a while ago!

I know you all know what I'm going through.

THE FIVE STAGES OF WRITER'S BLOCK
WE ALL GO THROUGH THEM

1. FRUSTRATION.
This is when you feel that you need to write something but no matter what you do, you just don't know what to write.


2.  PANIC.
This is when you start getting tweets and emails asking if you're dead and people start unfollowing because they think you're really dead even if you tell them you're not because they think it's your ghost that's tweeting/emailing them back!


3.  PARANOIA.
The part when you start thinking: "Am I really dead? My brain is not working. Should I start putting my brain in a blender and try to get the juice out?"

4. BLANK.
The part when you just can't think of anything. Like, ANYTHING...

5.  HYPERACTIVITY.

We all go through these stages, right?

No?

So it's just me then?

Damn!

Ahem.

So anyway, I'm at the 5th stage right now.

When I'm at the 5th stage, my creativity flows like a badass blogger!

And since I care, I'm gonna share a few topic sentences with you because I know you want one. I'm so generous, I know. My mom really raised me well.
  1. It's so hot that my sweat started sweating sweat like- Oooohhh... I'm gonna steal that dog! It's so cute!
  2. I have a boyfriend/girlfriend and my socks are dirty.
  3. Ants love me. Oh my god, where's my wallet?
  4. Now watching [insert TV show here] because I just pooped and now I've ran out of things to do.
  5. It's dark inside the cinema. OH-EM-GEEEEE... I'M HUNGRY!!!!!!!
You can totally establish connection with your readers with these brilliant topics. They are relatable, inspiring, deep, and somewhat emotional. Also sexy, if you really think about it. These will totally make your blogs shine!!!

You're welcome.

So what are you waiting for? Aren't you excited? Write now! Don't let your readers wait.

30 comments:

  1. ive just started following you, and your posts make me laugh. :)keep it up

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  2. I know. I have been feeling like this for a long time but i managed to write something just yesterday. It feels good to write almost anything out.

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  3. lol....very funny. i a new follower and i love your blog

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  4. I still write on occasion. to me it's more about time then writers block.

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  5. I know what you mean. My bigger problem seems to be coming up with the time to write something. Then when I do have time, the ideas are too many and I can't decide what my topic is going to be.

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  6. You make me laugh so bad, my stomach hurts! I started following you maybe a few weeks from now? Anyway, I love your posts and I was actually wondering why you haven't posted for a while. :)

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  7. haha this post has made my day, I can totally relate! I am laughing so hard! :)

    cheers!

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  8. My brain pretty much stays at stage 4! I'm pretty much a dumbass!

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  9. Thank you for describing my blogging experience today! :)

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  10. I've got writer's block so bad, I can't even come up with a decent comment.

    Jay

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  11. I'm hungry too. Bring me some food! :P

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  12. Lmao...this is what happens when I write songs. So then I just give up and freestyle.

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  13. Now that is some funny stuff keep up the great blog!

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  14. Reading your blog is like watching Friends. Every episode/blog entry is a guaranteed laugh at least once. I LOVE IT!

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  15. lovely post, got me smiling the extent that my colleagues had to ask and make sure I was okay.lol, anyway, first timer and following.
    www.apysworld.blogspot.com

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  16. I can totally relate. haven't wrote for more than a month!!! can I borrow your blender?

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  17. How'd you get ants to love you? Ants hate me.

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  18. @Everyone - Thank you!!! Having a writer's block is so frustrating!!! That's why I gave you topic suggestions! You're welcome. :p

    @Nicki - They love me so much that they keep biting me. That's love, right?

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  19. That happens to me a lot. Haha!

    And those topic suggestions of yours are great! But I dont think I can write about any of those. HAHAHA!

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  20. The other stage of writer's block? Avoidanc--er, research, yeah, research, by reading other people's blogs! :)

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  21. That point where you start questioning if you really are dead is truly the best point of all.

    It reminds me of people doubting that I had a best friend who blogged with me. They kept asking if she was imaginary and at one point, I thought maybe she might be.

    Lor

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  22. I think the fifth topic is sexy! hahaha! You came up with a topic from the paranoia of not having one. Brilliant!

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  23. Oh wow this is exactly what I needed to read. Thank you. I have been suffering from writers block and needed this.

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  24. Your 500th Follower..now aint that epic! :D

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  25. "Now watching [insert TV show here] because I just pooped and now I've ran out of things to do."

    That might be my favorite quote of all time... ;P

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  26. Eh, I do not really get writer's block for my blog.... but then again, my blog is not really funny or entertaining or snappy like yours is.

    But then again, maybe I should make it that way...

    I hate writers block though... I get it all the time and then waste my time on the internet.
    Yup, that's always what happens.

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  27. You should write about that girl.. what's she called again? Just.. Just... Justin Bimber. Oh yeah, that one!

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  29. You are so funny! I guess I feel like I always have material because my blog is an ongoing chronicle of my life. But I do have times when I want to write about something other than sex and I do get writers block. I can't say I go thru the 5 stages you do though lol. Your blog always manages to make me laugh! You're awesome!

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  30. Hahahaha
    I'm pretty sure people think I die everytime I stop blogging.....I should start scheduling a fake ghost to respond in my absence. This would be both entertaining and scary, and that combination only leads to greatness.
    Rawr

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