Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Not the bullshit kind of "It's not you. It's me" explanation.


Yes, a new post!!

Okay. Not the most brilliant intro. Forgive me. You've GOT to forgive me. It's (almost) Christmas after all. And I haven't caught up on my sleeping.

So this is just gonna be quick.

I know I have been MIA on this blog AND on your blogs this past month. December has always been too crazy for me. We (I mean, my coworkers and I) have been busy at work as we have been having the super famous MANDATORY OVERTIME that no one can escape from but I can't really complain because all of us are suffering from it and not just me and I totally understand why we have to finish all the medical reports before Christmas so how can I complain?

So that has been Monday night to Saturday morning (or midday-ish) for me.

Then on weekends, I rush to the bead store after work and buy the stuff that I need and go home and try to finish all the accessories that my friends ordered, which they need before Christmas because they are going to use the bracelets and/or necklaces as gifts to kids so I totally have to finish them. BEFORE. CHRISTMAS. Because the little girls are expecting them.

And I don't want to disappoint children.

So I still try to continue doing this after work.

Too much pressure.

Not that I'm complaining. I kinda need the extra income.

One of the bracelets I made for my coworker's 3-year-old niece.
Long story short, I barely have time to go online when I get home from work or on weekends. Actually, I don't. At all. I barely even have time to get a decent sleep. Especially on weekends.

Oh! And I haven't done my holiday shopping yet. So I'm gonna have a lot of people mad at me this year. No gifts.


I'll find a way.

So, that's all. I just thought I'd let you know that I'm not dead.

And as I said, it's not you. It's me. I still love you all. AND your blogs. AND I'm so trying to catch up.

And I'm still slightly active on Twitter.

On a brighter note, I got the package from Israel!! So remember when I announced that I won Israel's caption contest? I got the prize!! Someone protested but I'm good at ignoring people I don't know. *wink*

Here are the pictures:

Thanks again, Israel.

So, that's it. When I come back in January, I will tell you the whole story about the girl who stole my cake and her ridiculous side of the story (oh, you're not gonna believe this!) and a lot of other stuff that *I* think are funny.

Oh! Before I forget, I'd like to remind you that we are having a Martini and Mud Pack Online Blogger Social so if you have your pictures ready, you can email them to me. You all know my email address. If you don't, let me know in the comments section.

Also, I know you've all been busy. It's Christmas.


P.S. I'd like to apologize in advance if you see some typo and/or incoherent sentences in this post. My brain is starting to shut down.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

The Perfect Christmas Gift For THAT FRIEND You Secretly Hate

This is the season for gift giving. More often than not, thinking of a gift for every family member and friend is a difficult task.

But it is certainly more difficult to think of a gift for THAT FRIEND.

Yes. That friend you secretly hate. That friend who will conceivably expect a gift even if they know you don't like them that much.

I have a few suggestions. Of course, fuckers! When did I ever fail you? I have the solution to everything. What??

Let's begin!

1. For that friend who always tries to please everyone, who alters their personality based on what they think a certain person would like, tries to get everyone's approval- but they always claim that they're being true to themselves.

Gift suggestion: A full-face white mask. And sleeping pills.

So the mask is too obvious. Like- "Yeah, yeah, a mask for their different personalities... blah-blah-blah.." Bite. Me.

Wait. But the pills? You're not gonna include it in the gift box where they could see it right away. It should be a surprise. When you can't bear the pretensions anymore, just slip a few pills into their drink and when they're asleep, you will not be annoyed anymore. And at least they got to rest. Pretending all the time must be tiring. It's for a good cause.

2. For that friend who doesn't care how long you've been waiting for them because they had to change their outfit 10 times more than a normal person should is always late because of "traffic". (I know. I have issues with this friend. Shut. Up.)

Gift suggestion: Ball and chain.

Did you expect I would suggest you give them a watch? That is SO gradeschool! People who are always late do not look at the time! They don't care. Don't waste your money on gifts that they won't even use! The ball and chain would be perfect. You just attach it to their ankle and throw away the key. That way, they will never use the "traffic" excuse again and you will no longer feel like an idiot all the time. They are late because it's so hard to walk. Perfect!

3. For that friend who thinks they know everything and that their opinions are the only ones that should be heard and no one could ever argue because all of you are wrong and they are right.

Gift Suggestion: Pen and paper.

They should write a rule book. I mean, with a brain like that?

4. For that friend person (because who would have a friend like this) who takes things that don't belong to them (aka The Thief).
So you ordered and paid for something and had it delivered to your work place and someone cold-bloodedly took it. While you're waiting for it. I know, sneaky. And shameless.

Gift Suggestion: A "movie poster" with them on it.

Have it framed. It should look expensive, unique, and personalized. No, it's not a mugshot. And it's not a Wanted poster either. Tell them you made it look like a movie poster. They should feel like a celebrity with this kind of glamorous portrait.

Yes, that last one just happened to me. Oh! She can have my cake and eat it too. No. Literally. She stole my cake. She can eat it.

And yes. It's the last suggestion for today. Who stops at #4? Me! I'm weird like that.

Do you have other friends that you secretly hate?


The martini and mudmask option won the poll. Tyla is currently working on the invitation. You can send me your pictures via Email, Twitter, or Facebook. We have 3 weeks to prepare. Let's consider this our New Year's Party.