No One's Jealous Of You Okay???

This is about a certain person that I know. I hope she gets to read this (right after she's done glorifying herself) and get a rude awakening without realizing that she's the one I'm actually talking about.

Not that she's stupid but she has the ability of fooling herself. I think she would try to think that this is not about her even if I relate to you a few actual conversations. It's her talent, really.

So here it goes...

Not only does this girl think she's prettier than she actually is, but also, she thinks she's a lot prettier than most celebrities! There was this time when we were talking about Jennifer Aniston that she actually when I said Jennifer was pretty. It is kinda shocking to me because she disses most celebrities. But then she said something like, "I can only appreciate those who look better than me."

Someone somewhere needs to look in the mirror. That's when I realized, this is a serious case, worse than I thought.



Jennifer is like scratching her head in this photo. It could be because of this
story...







But wait... there's more!

We were having coffee at Starbucks one night with two guys, both her friends. Not mine. One of the guys suggested that we go to a karaoke bar.

By the way, this girl I'm talking about can actually sing. And I don't mean that sarcastically. She really can.

So anyway, as the guy was suggesting, he asked me if I could come. I said sure. I love karaoke. Then this girl pointed at me and said to the guy, "She's actually cool to be with because she's not embarrassed to sing along even if I am the one who's singing."



Did she actually expect that when we go karaoke, it's because we want to listen to her sing? Tell you what, if you expect that you're the only one who's gonna be singing, then let's not split the bill. Pay it yourself. Or better yet, go there alone. Sing all you want and applaud yourself!

This is a serious case of narcissistic personality disorder. Someone call a therapist!

This is an emergency!


Lots of times, she has ranted about the people who dislike her. She says it's because they envy her because she's smart and men admire her, blah blah blah... She actually told me that it's not common to be good at both English and Math but she is.

Where she gets the guts to say these, I don't know. Maybe from her unending line of admirers (that I don't think actually exists) or from the person who wants to hire her as a model (who of course, she tells me exists). I actually doubt the latter more. Not that I'm jealous, but to tell you honestly, she looks like a 30-year-old trapped in a fifth grader's body. Yes, she has a body of an adolescent. And when she sees people surprised to know her real age, she thinks it's because she looks young. Come on! You're like 4 feet. Okay, not really.

I hope you're reading this, Ms. Deny-All-You-Want-But-You-Know-Who-You-Are. How can I say this... No one's jealous of you okay??? It's all in your head! It's actually okay to be confident but you need a doctor. Please see a shrink. For mankind's sake.

To the others who might eventually read this, there's a lot more stories about this girl... I'm actually gonna make her popular. This is obviously what she wants... SPOTLIGHT!